Febriyan Writing about life and anything that happen in life is one of my to do things. That's the reason blog Blog Review, Tips & Inspirasi by Febriyan Lukito born. Now I also admins for: Tempat Nongkrong Seru Pikiran Random Tulisan Blogger Indonesia

[EF#18] How To Deal With Complicated Relationship

2 min read

how to deal with complicated relationship

Complicated relationship is one thing that we are not looking for in life, or do you? I mean, without any complicated relationship itself, we already have many complicated things in our life. Why do we need to get into the complicated relationship? And how to deal with complicated relationship?

Talking about relationship, we aren’t talking about the man and woman relationship only. Relationship has broader meaning than that, it is about all kind of relation such as relationship between mother and father, parent and kids, between coworkers, etc. We are used to ‘simplified’ our mind into the couple’s relationship. Well, let’s talk about relationship in general – not limited to the couple’s relationship.

Why do we need a relationship

Human is an individualist and at the same time also a social being. Being individualist, man think they don’t need any kind of relations with other, but as social being, they always seek for others to socialize. To chit-chatting up to mutuality relation-kind.

However, developing relationship between human is not that simple. Along came the spiders, that’s the consequences of any kind of relationship. Each human bring their own spiders into the relationship and these spiders could spread around along the relationship itself. That’s what made the relationship became complicated.

Complicated Relationship

Yes, relationship is actually good thing to do for us, human, but what we did unintentionally made it complicated day by day. We may not realize it now, but if you look at it again, after some time, you know what was actually happened. That we brings our personal problems into the relationship and as I mentioned above, that’s made the complicated relationship.

how to deal with complicated realtionship
Let’s eat rather than stressed out

In my own opinion, the complicated relationship is the best. Why do I say that? Because through this kind of relationship, we can learn many things. Let’s take it this way, for example, a man who is depressed at home would take it to the office and unintentionally would be angry to all co-workers. The co-workers would feel depressed also.

The co-workers went back home and share the depression to the whole family members, perhaps scolding them all for something they didn’t do – just like what he had at the office.  And after some times, we realized that actually we did something wrong and others also did something wrong. Finally we all learn from those mistakes.

That’s why the complicated relationship is the best, because we can learn so much with all those mistakes.

How to deal with complicated relationship

Now, let’s talk about how. How to deal with complicated relationship as such? We are already in this kind of relationship, whether you know or not, whether you like it or not. What we need to do is how to deal with it.

The first thing to do is ACCEPTING. Yes, what we can do now is accepting the fact that we are already in the complicated relationship, whatever the form it is. Just like talking about goodbye, what we can do is to accept that it is a goodbye.

Second thing to do after accepting the fact is that let’s check what is the thing that making our relationship complicated. If you look through it, I am sure that you will see the root of the complicated relationship is actually ourselves.

Like what I’ve mentioned above, it is actually our EGO as individualist that make all those relationships become complicated. Yes, we are who we are, but in order to get things done in a group (kind of relationships), we need to take our ego off. Think as a group, as a team.

By being a group member or team member in any kind of relationships you are in, you are saying that, I am not and will not involved in any complicated relationship. Because I care about how the group/team works not about how I work.

As I was saying in my twitter replied to relationship topic:

Human is complicated being, that’s why many relationship become complicated – Twitter @feb_ryan24

So what is it that make any relationship complicated? Human… yes, ourselves. How do you deal with complicated relationship? Knowing yourself more and be uncomplicated being in any kind of relationship.


This post is a submission for English Friday Weekly Challenge from Blog English Club. Please do check the link if you want to join. Let’s learn English by practicing more – writing more. Ah, instead of stressed out because of relationship, let’s take a coffee.

Febriyan Writing about life and anything that happen in life is one of my to do things. That's the reason blog Blog Review, Tips & Inspirasi by Febriyan Lukito born. Now I also admins for: Tempat Nongkrong Seru Pikiran Random Tulisan Blogger Indonesia

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23 Replies to “[EF#18] How To Deal With Complicated Relationship”

  1. I’m sorry for commenting this late, Mas :hehe.
    Duh, aku mah hubungan tidak yang ribet-ribet, Mas. Aku mah kayak gitu :hehe.
    Soalnya kalau bertahan di hubungan yang tidak sehat mah cuma membuat sakit hati, jadi kalau saya mah friend zone ajah :hehe.
    Setuju dengan Mas Dani dan Mas Rifki di atas :hihi.

  2. For this challenge I wrote about my complicated relationship with debt. How I have to deal with debt? Just like you said the first thing to do “I has to accepted” 🙂 Another nice tips from Mas Ryan. Thank you!

    1. When do you want to Fajar? *so sorry replied in English, but I made a pledge to make Friday as English day, including the comments*

      Please check my post tomorrow, choose where we want to have a coffee

  3. Wuah this is right. Each of us is a complicated human that makes our own relationship with anyone or anything complicated sometimes and that is called life 😀 😀

    1. Yes Mbak, the ego is the spider that came along in all kind of relationship. 😀
      Any tips for dealing with complicated relationship Mbak?

  4. Or sometimes just focus on the healthy ones that bring you good. Just say goodbye to that complicated ones. Why dwell in that kind relationship that will only waste your time and energy? 😀

    1. hahaha… nice one. that’s one way to do it also. 🙂
      but for me, at least try to fix it first. Otherwise, I will get use to run away – but that’s me. 😀

      1. Of course try tl fix it first lah. But you gotta learn the limit. When is the time to call that this is it.

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